Matt Forney
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Category Archives for Fat Girls

final thoughts

Final Thoughts on Picking Up Fat Girls

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. We big game hunters walk a lonely path. Other men shun us. They think we’re freaks. “Ew, you actually LIKE fat girls?” Telling your friends that you like […]

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super-sized

A Super-Sized Love Story

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. Hard to believe, but I wasn’t always the veritable Captain Ahab I am today. My road to (fat) poosy paradise was paved with the diarrhea dumps of countless […]

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tips

Other Tips for Picking Up Fat Girls

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. While there is some degree of nuance involved in harpooning whales, the action plan I’ve taught you will get you laid 95 to 99 percent of the time. […]

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make love

How to Make Love to a Fat Girl

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. Oh yeah, my man. Now it’s time to strap on your raincoat and go spelunking in the Chubby Crevasses. But before you stick it in, you’ve got some […]

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date

How to Date a Fat Girl

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. While most swine are happy to go for a roll in the mud, you occasionally get the one shy pig who doesn’t want to play. When this happens, […]

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meet

How to Meet Fat Girls

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. Now that you’re jacked, can cook like Gordon Ramsey, have a dick that could choke a horse, and can leave the house without spunking yourself, it’s time to […]

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need

What You Need to Pick Up Fat Girls

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. Chubby chasing ain’t no foolin’ around, son. Before you can dive into the undulating blubber of a BBW, you need to work on yourself first. Here’s what you […]

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The Day I Became a Chubby Chaser

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists. You have the BBW section of YouPorn bookmarked. You can’t shop at Walmart or dine at all-you-can-eat buffets because you’re tired of having to wash pre-cum stains out […]

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Alternate Reality News: Anti-Fat Discrimination Bill Passes Senate, Unlikely to Survive House

WASHINGTON — Fat acceptance advocates around the nation celebrated today as a bill to end discrimination against fat people resoundingly cleared the Senate. The Petunia Wentworth Anti-Size Discrimination Act of 2013 passed early Monday with a vote of 58-42. Four Republicans (Lisa Murkowski of Alaska, Deb Fischer of Nebraska, Kelly Ayotte of New Hampshire and Susan […]

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The BBW’s Ultimate Guide to Fat Sex

Hey there, girlfriend! It’s not easy being a big, beautiful woman in our fatphobic society. Despite the facts that thin doesn’t equal healthy and that beauty comes in all sizes, the media continues to enforce an artificial standard of beauty and thinness on women, causing them to feel shame towards their natural bodies. It’s gotten […]

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