I’m both enormously sick and hard at work trying to pull myself out of the huge pile of work I’m buried in, so here are some thoughts I’ve picked up on dating and smashing Filipino girls for the past month.
1. If you want to date Filipinas, you better be prepared to play a whole new set of games.
Yes, it is ludicrously easy to get laid here. Yes, in a good number of cases, all you need to do is show up and not be a weirdo to get the pussy. But Filipinas are far from stupid; they’re cunning and have their own share of stupid head games they play. It’s nowhere near as bad as the States, but like all women, Filipinas have an inner predator that they’re all too willing to unleash on idiotic men.
If you let them walk all over you, they will, so you need to go in prepared.
One big game that Filipinas love to play with men is the last minute meeting change-up. It goes like this: you’ll start texting her, she’ll agree to meet you at place X, but then an hour before you meet, she’ll suddenly text you asking to meet at place Y instead because it’s “closer.” This is despite the fact that she had no problem meeting you at place X the night before. I’ve had no less than six girls in the past month try and pull this on me and I’ve nexted every single one. This kind of game is an obvious power play: if you accede to her demands and change up your plans on her whim, she will be dictating the frame of the relationship.
For example, the first time a girl tried this on me, we had agreed to meet at a coffeeshop that was just up the street from my house in downtown Davao. Not an hour before our date, after I’d already arrived at the mall where the shop was, I get a text from her asking if we can meet at this other mall that happens to be closer to her house… a mall that is on the outskirts of town and would take me at least an hour-and-a-half to get to accounting for traffic. I politely told her no, then blocked her number from my phone. (I also later found out that she had hid the fact that she was a single mother from me.)
This game is probably the most insidious as the girl doesn’t start fucking with you until just before your date, but there are plenty of others you need to look out for as well. For example, if a Filipina starts whining at any point about her life (“I hate my job, I hate my classwork,” etc.), next her. Not only does this indicate that she has a low resilience for pain and struggle, it’s only a matter of time before she starts hitting you up for money. Honest Filipinas deal with their struggles with dignity and are too proud to ask for handouts from foreigners; I once tried to give my current girlfriend money for a taxi and she flatly refused.
To the outside observer, it might seem ridiculous that I’m advocating cutting off contact with Filipinas the minute they show dishonesty or attitude. “Real men figure out how to deal with these problems, not run away from them!” What you don’t get is that your value as a foreign man is so high in the Philippines that you will never lack for female company provided you put in a bare minimum of effort. For every girl who tries to force you into her frame or extort money out of you, there are three more who will treat you like a king.
There’s no reason to put up with shit from one girl where there are so many more willing to sleep with you.
2. If a Filipina can barely communicate in written English, next her.
English is one of the official languages of the Philippines, learning it is mandatory in schools, and the government favors it when it comes to written documentation. While few Filipinos are 100 percent fluent in English, you can hold conversations with them easily provided you tone down your use of slang and ten-dollar words. For example, as I found out the hard way, Filipinos don’t say “o” in place of “zero” in spoken English when it comes to long numbers (ex: if you read off “103” as “one oh three,” many Filipinos will have no clue what you’re talking about; you have to say “one zero three” or “one hundred and three”). While most of the girls I’ve known send typo-filled English texts, I can understand them easily, and we can have conversations where I display my wit and wisdom.
In a country where English is so widely used and learning it is mandatory, what does that say about girls who can barely write in it?
Answer: they’re dumb as rocks. They’re lazy. Attempting to woo them over a cup of coffee will be torturous because they won’t understand anything you say. I made the mistake of trying to date one girl who could only send illiterate one-syllable word texts, and most of our “date” consisted of me pantomiming with my arms hoping and praying something would penetrate her thick skull. She was pretty cute, but the language barrier was simply too big to cross.
This goes back to what I discussed in point one: given that most Filipinas speak passable English, why waste your time on one who can barely grunt out “I love you?” Filipino culture isn’t exactly intellectual to begin with; at times, it feels like this place got frozen in time somewhere around 1987. There’s no reason to make things hard on yourself by trying to screw a girl who isn’t smart enough to count to ten in a language she was required to study throughout school.
3. If a girl wants to bring one of her friends along on a date, let her.
This might sound like a game, but it’s not. Remember: as a foreign man in the Philippines, you are a rock star. Half the girls here dream of being married to a white guy, and when she tells her family she’s dating a foreigner, they practically high-five each other. When a girl wants to bring her friend along on a date, it’s a form of bragging: “Ha ha, look at the cool white guy I’m dating!” Having that friend along will make it way easier to seal the deal with your girl, because like all girls, Filipinas’ opinions are in part dictated by their social group. Make a good impression on the friend, you make an even better impression on your girl.
4. Creating a harem here is all but required due to the lax labor laws.
As you’d expect from a second-world country, the Philippines lacks many of the labor protections that Americans take for granted. When it comes to girls you date who have jobs (particularly teenage girls), most of them are working twelve hours a day, six days a week. This means you’ll only be able to see them a couple days a week at most. If you need companionship around the clock, you’ll have to make your peace with the idea of keeping multiple girls on rotation. If that makes you feel bad, just remind yourself that a good number of these girls are fucking around on you despite their protestations of chastity and fidelity. Why do you think the fertility rate is so high in this country?
5. Bring your own condoms.
I’m not kidding you. Not only are condoms here too small for the average white man (Filipinos being less endowed on average), wrapping it up is damn near required given the country’s laws. The Philippines is one of the few countries on Earth where abortion is illegal, thanks to the efforts of the Catholic Church, meaning a slip-up in the baby department means massive pain for you. While the Philippines and the U.S. don’t have a child support extradition agreement—meaning if you knock a girl up, you can get off the hook by fleeing the country—I’m not fond of the idea of leaving my child to be raised in a Southeast Asian ghetto.
6. If a Filipina wears bikinis, she’s a slut.
This one comes from my friend Larry. The Philippines still values female modesty and chastity (at least in public), meaning that revealing outfits are a no-no for Filipino girls. The ones who do wear them are girls who’ve spent some time outside the country and have absorbed some of the culture of wherever they went (read: they were riding the cock carousel until their labias turned blue). This is probably less true in the more liberal parts of the country, though.
Keep in mind that these are my observations and not a strict guide. I will likely post more detailed information on banging Filipino girls later, when I have more experiences to comment on.
Read Next: Brief Thoughts on Living in the Philippines
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