Matt Forney
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Don’t Bang Latvia, Bang Estonia, and Bang Lithuania by Roosh V

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Roosh is back at it with a trio of new travel guides, focusing on the Baltic nations of Estonia, Latvia and Lithuania. Even better, for today only, he’s selling all three of them in a bundle for just $3. Whether you’re planning a vacation to eastern Europe or you just like Roosh’s writing, read on to see what I think of these new books.

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Don’t Bang Latvia: How to Sleep with Latvian Women in Latvia Without Getting Scammed by Roosh V

Unlike Don’t Bang Denmark, which was a comedic skewering of everything about that country, Don’t Bang Latvia is a more serious warning to stay the hell away. The skinny is that while Latvia was once a paradise of beautiful, loose women, hordes of sleazy sex tourists and annoying British stag parties over the years have turned it into an apocalyptic wasteland. The most attractive Latvian women want nothing to do with foreigners, while the middling-to-cute ones are soulless scammers hell bent on taking your money and leaving you dick in hand.

If you’re in a club where there are a lot of foreign guys, I guarantee there are tons of scammer chicks present. There are several signs to look for: they hang out in pairs at tourist clubs; they always dress sexy; they never buy their own drinks (it would reduce their profit margin); they make regular eye contact with foreign guys; they’re under 30 years old; and they aren’t in the club with a guy friend (they don’t want to scare away the male clientele). I like to think that my people-reading skills are advanced and that I can pick out acting better than the average guy, but there were three scam attempts done on me that I didn’t see coming. These girls are amazing actresses and will deceive you even if you’re experienced. As long as you keep the counterstrategies in mind, you’ll be straight.

Bang Estonia: How to Sleep with Estonian Women in Estonia by Roosh V

The second Baltic country Roosh visited, it’s a huge step up from Latvia. The women are hotter and more feminine than Latvians and there are no scammers to be found.

The bad news I’ve already hinted at is that it used to be much better. In Tartu I met an American guy named Stan who had lived in the country for five years. He said it was poosy paradise when he first arrived. He was approached so often by girls who wanted sex that he had to tell them to go away. I’m sure the quality wasn’t always high, but the fact that it was happening could only mean good fortune for men who were in Estonia during that time. He also knew a guy who would regularly take a girl to a hotel room to bang and then return to the bar to find another one to take back.

Bang Lithuania: How to Sleep with Lithuanian Women in Lithuania by Roosh V

The last country Roosh visited, it has the most attractive women in the Baltics, but they’re also the hardest to lay. Again, there aren’t any scammers.

I went inside and was stunned to find that it was packed with more women than men. The bar had narrow walkways with people standing up. The music wasn’t too loud. Was I in a bar in America? The logistics were perfect, the first time I had encountered such an American-style venue in Eastern Europe. All that was missing were the fat American girls in flip-flops singing along to Bon Jovi. My mood immediately brightened. I ordered a drink and leaned against the bar. I couldn’t believe I had found a spot that was tailor-made for me.

The biggest problem with all three guides is that they’re rather thin compared to Roosh’s previous ones, due to the fact that he spent little time in each country (a month in each) and due to the fact that the countries themselves are pretty small. Still, the low, low price (all three books for just $3!) makes them worth buying.

Click here to buy Don’t Bang Latvia, Bang Estonia and Bang Lithuania.

Read Next: Around the World in 80 Girls: The Epic 3 Year Trip of a Backpacking Casanova by Neil Skywalker