Matt Forney
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final thoughts

Final Thoughts on Picking Up Fat Girls

This is an excerpt from my now-discontinued book Big Lovin’: The Guide to Picking Up Fat Chicks, a satire of the fat acceptance movement and pickup artists.

We big game hunters walk a lonely path.

Other men shun us. They think we’re freaks. “Ew, you actually LIKE fat girls?” Telling your friends that you like curves is a grand way to end up with no friends. Most men are conformist sheep who pretend to like those skinny bitches because the media tells them to. They’ll never understand us.

Fat women themselves don’t like us very much. They think that we’re “misogynistic” and “objectifying” them. It doesn’t make any sense; given the horrendous treatment they get in our fatphobic society, they should be happy that they’re getting any attention at all. Stuck-up bitches.

But while we are few in numbers, we are not alone. We are a silent brotherhood, united across nations and cultures, in pursuit of that which we love most: fat pussy!

By reading this book and internalizing its lessons, you are now a member of this brotherhood. You have everything you need to prowl the savannah, seeking out the biggest, mightiest game and taking it down to mount above your fireplace. You are one of us.

Use this information well, my brothers. Go forth and slay without shame! Raise the flag of fatty fucking upon the desecrated corpse of modern dating! Sound the mating call of the chubby chaser atop the highest peaks! No nation, no land will be safe from us, the brotherhood of the wobbling flab!

And most importantly, my friends: have fun!

P.S. If you’re ready to start meeting BBWs now, click here.

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