Matt Forney
Spread the Word!

If Your Girlfriend Drinks, She’s Cheating on You

girlfriend-drinks

This is a guest post by the Captain Power.

It is a scientific fact that most women have a lower tolerance to alcohol than men. Women are generally affected by alcohol more because they tend to have a higher proportion of body fat. As fat cannot absorb alcohol, it is concentrated at higher levels in the blood.

Women also have less dehydrogenase, a gastric enzyme that metabolizes or breaks down alcohol before it enters the bloodstream. Because of this, women absorb up to nearly 30% more alcohol into their bloodstream than men of the same height and weight who drink the same amount of alcohol.

Women are also usually shorter and lighter than men, further concentrating alcohol in their blood. Therefore, when women of average size consume one drink, it will have almost the same effect as two drinks do for the average-size man.

So what does this all mean? If your girlfriend goes out and drinks alcohol, you are most likely getting cheated on.

Women by nature are predetermined in their D.N.A to get pregnant and reproduce, and until they reach menopause they need a constant supply of penis to provide fertility. Your girlfriend might prefer your penis, but once the alcohol kicks in and she is inebriated, your penis is useless.  Out of site, out of mind (but full of semen).

In my entire life I have never met a women who was out drinking and didn’t cheat on her boyfriend. This is my rule of thumb:

  • One drink:  Talking to a guy (harmless).
  • Two drinks:  Talking very close (borderline kiss close).
  • Three drinks:  Makeout session.
  • Four drinks: Makeout session and a feel up.
  • Five drinks:  Bathroom blowjob.
  • Six drinks: Hotel or backseat of the car.

The few drinking exceptions for women include weddings, work parties, birthday parties with male friends, and suicide attempts. Hormone changes during the menstrual cycle can also affect alcohol metabolism adversely, increasing the impact of alcohol.

Cheers!

girlfriend-drinks

The Captain Power blogs at Captain Power’s Underground Training SiteAlso check out his book Work Out, Lose Weight and Stop Being Single.

Read Next: All Women Have Sex Within 24 Hours of Breaking Up with You

  • earl

    And yet it’s the guys that go all Rapey McRaperson when alcohol is involved.

  • Retrenched

    Well, it depends. A girl who goes out by herself or with one other friend is most certainly looking to get fucked. But a girl who goes out with a group of friends is usually just there to be seen, and to flirt and cocktease – she may sometimes get drunk and horny enough to go home with a random guy, but she’s expecting her friends to cockblock him so she doesn’t leave with him.

    YMMV, but that’s what I’ve seen over the years.

  • Retrenched

    “most certainly” should be “almost certainly”.. but hey, close enough.

  • Blue

    I don’t really agree with this. I think if you worry about getting cheated on just because your girl friend drinks you’re probably an insecure little shit. On the other hand, being an insecure little shit will, without fail, cause you to get cheated on. There are plenty of other indicators that are actually worth talking about and not prejudicial and silly.

  • yodax

    Blue: … prejudicial …

    That’s the first time I’ve seen that word used in the manosphere. It’s a manboob word.

  • “Guys who don’t trust their girlfriend to go out drinking and not cheat are insecure” is the mantra of the weakling beta who lets his girl do whatever he wants because he’s scared to put his foot down and lose her. No man likes that shit, and strong men don’t put up with girls nights out.

  • earl

    There’s a difference between insecurity and stupidity.

    A creature with lowered inhibitions to start with…is given a drink that lowers those inhibitions even more. Yeah that’s a good idea.

  • I think this is yet another case of “If she didn’t want to sleep with you, she wouldn’t be doing X.” In this case, drinking alone in public.

    When a woman’s being faithful, she generally only wants to get drunk with you; if she’s dragged out by coworkers, and she’s faithful, expect her to appear at your place needing sex. If she doesn’t, she’s ready to hop to the next lily-pad.

  • Brz

    There’s something even more simpler than that : if your girlfriend is pretty enough to be hit on by men, the odds are great that she’ll cheat or that she already had cheated on you.
    There’s now a huge database which contains an endless list of evidences showing how much women need narcissistic validation and how much weak they are to flattery: Facebook. They put duck-face pics on their wall for narcissistic validation, they count the number of “likes” under their new status which says “I’ve just eaten chocolate and cuddled my cat <3" for narcissistic validation, they flirt softly with some poor guy who keep running hopelessly after them for narcissistic validation and they make rendez-vous with guys-who-are-not-like-my-boyfriend for narcissistic validation and because our little princesses must always reassure themselves and be sure that little boyfriend is still the best.
    They do all of this with no guilt, they measure coldly the effect their appearance provoke on men, they count, they weight, they compare, because that's what men are : tools, the cool tool which will make them feel pretty and desirable, the reliable and strong tool which will make their lives more easy on the long term (and maybe matches with the color of the curtains).
    And they spread their legs when all that attention is not enough, that's the only thing they never manage to be rational about, to not control : the compulsive leg-spreading thing.

    The only scandal in this story is all the lying, all the permanent denying, how they ironically profoundly hate sluts and how they permit themselves to be so jealous while they're cheating on you. If women weren't so jealous, the sex matter would be dealt in heterosexual relationships like it is dealt among the gays, with pragmatism : perfect monogamy is impossible, so let's just have open relationships.
    The slut is the most respectable kind of all women because she's the most honest, men need to stop believe women, stop being loyal and declare their love of slutty women.
    As we can all have now have the proof of the profound sluttery of women, the end of the fake-loyal-wife who is just another slut who lies better than the others and the uprising of the proud slut will maybe save the monogamous marriage.

  • I want to pound that fucking girl in the picture until her cunt bleeds.

  • Retrenched

    So when that girl in the pic is drunk enough, she’ll let you know by taking her shirt off, right?

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  • @Retrenched
    ¡EXACTAMENTE!
    Yeah this one’s no brainer- girls who drink around also fuck around.
    muy bien

  • bluedot

    Captain Power you are retarded! This is hilarious! I don’t think you’ve ever actually been in close proximity to a living, breathing girl.

    Tom, Captain Power and all the commenters are so entertaining! What a sad, sweaty, seedy and desperate congregation of losers!

  • Steve

    wow… how sad and pathetic I am.

    [CensorBot sez: Stop whining.]

  • Pauline

    This is complete bullshit. I moved to USA this spring as an exchange student. Far away from my boyfriend. There were a lot of handsome guys flirting with me both at parties and other occations. I was completely wasted at times but i never even considered to cheat. I talked to guys and that was it. I was away from my boyfriend for 6 months. Stop generalizing please. There are plenty of boyfriends who cheats when they drink too so it goes both ways. It all depends on the personality not the gender.

  • fhardes

    No man you mistake with attention whores. I know many AW but I have also been dating a lot of reliable chicks. I must agree that today this is not easy for a white man to find a wife but we black people (considered either as a dildo by non-black or child support payer by sisters) have been into that trouble for decades… You just spot the wrong one or you go way too much to the same places.

  • Blake

    This isn’t really a surprise. Alcohol causes girls to be slutty in general, it increases sexual desire. Who would disagree with this?

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  • Haylie Roche

    god forbid a girl just wants to have a drink.

  • Sam Touchh

    the right place and the right time women cheat more than men since they get hit on all the time

  • Sam Touchh

    maybe those guys don’t know about gaming on you since you were already tipsy

  • Sam Touchh

    if alcohol can make drivers get into car accidents or make the wrong decisions, then why wouldn’t it does the same thing to women that would most certainly to cheat once she’s drunk or tipsy [

  • Gregory J. Toma

    Well, since women feel emotionally neglected just as often as guys are horny, I fail to see your point ;)

  • Jasper Denarius

    I am going to kill myself. Your article has helped me to solidify this decision. Whatever the pharmaceutical people pay you to help depress people has paid off for them. I’m ready to leave. Everything I wanted to believe was a lie, and everything I loved is dead. There is no future. Thanks for making this a little easier for me. Life was hard enough and navigating everything since the big change for me has been difficult. But this kind of content spells it out as I need to understand it. There’s no one out there to make it okay. I have no place in this world, and nothing in this world is going to comfort me, except the knowledge that it’ll be over for me soon. You’re doing good work. This is a terrible world and more people should understand and leave accordingly. I hope to take down as many worthless sluts and douchebags on my way out as possible. When you read the news headline, give yourself a congratulatory masturbatory session. You’ve done well. I hope your world burns a little less than average, for speaking the truth. May every woman die a horrible death and watch her horrid children die violently before her eyes. Goodbye, and good night. Burn hard. Burn slowly.

  • You have a lot of issues, buddy.

  • Ryan

    Actually to be fair…the guys that thought they had all the swag in the world and wouldn’t car that their girls were out made it that much easy for me to slay them in the bedroom haha! They always said “oh my BF doesn’t care that I am out”. Great my place, I’ll get you back in the morning? “Sounds good, lemme finish my drink!”. A few times a have a girl chlamydia and she gave it to the BF. Lol! Dumbasses should be men and actually take charge of their hoes. If you can’t step up like a man and run the house then I will make sure to slide right in that pussy. I also keep their numbers so I always have an infinite amount of pussy ready at a moments notice! Sorry but that’s their dumbass guys fault if they want to be naive. Women are just as horny as men and if you let them get to step 1 enable them to get drinks without you, you just made my job easier :)

  • Ryan

    You’re a dumbass, I’d get you drinks and make you cheat guaranteed. I have my game down to a science. Then you would blame the alcohol not the fact that you are an idiot and shouldn’t put yourself in bad situations.

  • Ryan

    Actually to be fair…the guys that thought they had all the swag in the world and wouldn’t car that their girls were out made it that much easy for me to slay them in the bedroom haha! They always said “oh my BF doesn’t care that I am out”. Great my place, I’ll get you back in the morning? “Sounds good, lemme finish my drink!”. A few times a have a girl chlamydia and she gave it to the BF. Lol! Dumbasses should be men and actually take charge of their hoes. If you can’t step up like a man and run the house then I will make sure to slide right in that pussy. I also keep their numbers so I always have an infinite amount of pussy ready at a moments notice! Sorry but that’s their dumbass guys fault if they want to be naive. Women are just as horny as men and if you let them get to step 1 enable them to get drinks without you, you just made my job easier :)

  • L91

    I used to drink plenty and I never cheated on my boyfriend. Firsthand experience!

  • maria smith

    Oh you are such a butt hurt misogynistic fuck. You clearly date some low life women. Any woman with an ounce of class wouldn’t do that. Probably why you’re single fuckface.

  • maria smith

    And what do you call men? You little whores will fuck anything that you could stick your penis into.

    Most women aren’t like that, jaded prick.

  • nick c

    Yes they are, and by your infamous slut anthem “what do you call men?” leads me to believe you are a penis gobbler on the down low.

  • nick c

    You cheated, you just dont remember because you were so shit faced. Its called sexual assault in America by the way….If you are an exchange student from Europe you DEFINITELY gave out some drunk blowjobs…its in your nature.

  • nick c

    Give the teens a break they live in Denmark LMAO!!!

  • Lauren

    This article is hilarious. Fabulous trolling haha

  • Virginia Gardenhire

    This is satirical, correct? I just stumbled upon this, and since there are men(and women) sexist and ignorant enough to mean this seriously it’s a bit of a toss. Anyone familiar enough with this guy to confirm it’s a joke?

  • Cherry Grace Diaz

    Just stay away from alcohol if you’re not with your loved one or with someone who can prevent you from doing things you’ll regret in the morning. The last thing you want is a viral video of yourself, so be careful especially nowadays, since it’s so easy to take and upload videos in the internet.

  • dblbass128

    Ehh most dudes I know and have known are not like that and prefer monogamy. Your statement is old. Only insecure guys do that shit. What guy wouldn’t prefer unprotected sex with his SO than weird awkward protected sex with a complete stranger? But I think it’s cute that the first line of defense is “what do you call guys that sleep with everyone blah blah blah” ah fangul this is why men don’t marry there’s no need to lol

  • dblbass128

    Yes lol actually the insecure woman sleeps around and cries when the dude who railed her doesn’t csll the next day

  • dblbass128

    Desperate? If that helps you sleep at night knowing the truth that hurts. Sluts are great free sex no need to provide for, or even more so no need to be dumb enough to get married and lose half your shit like some assholes lol

  • dblbass128

    Haha

  • maria smith

    Guess what hun, most WOMEN are the same way. Any woman who knows her worth and the worth of her man wouldn’t dream of doing anything shitty. Some of the classless things that have come out of a guys mouth, it is disgusting. And then they expect to somehow get a good, honest, hardworking woman.

    And yes, I’ll use that defense. The last I checked, most guys high five their friends for sleeping around and shame women for even conversing with a guy.

  • maria smith

    You’re a fool. A sad, jaded, fool who has obviously been hurt by an immature girl who can’t see or does not care about the consequences of her actions. Most women are not like what you describe. Most women are good, hardworking, and don’t get trashy wasted.