Matt Forney
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How to Infuriate Married Women Who Complain About Their Husbands

nagging-wife1

The next time you find yourself in a conversation with a woman and she’s whining about what an inattentive lout her husband is, drop this line:

“Yeah, that sucks, but remember, you’re the one who said ‘Yes.'”

Without fail, this line will drive every single one of them batshit crazy. It doesn’t matter how old they are, where they come from or their religious background, this line causes the hamster in every married woman’s brain to go nuclear. The secret is to say it matter-of-factly, like you’re telling her about the weather; it’ll make her freakout seem all the more ridiculous in comparison.

Why does this line cause wives so much distress?

Simple: modern women are allergic to the idea of taking any responsibility for their actions. Things just happen to them; they’re innocent victims of a misogynistic world. The way American women bitch about their husbands, you’d think they were all kidnap victims, who were going on their merry way one day when an unscrupulous drunk grabbed them, stuffed them in a burlap bag, and dragged them off to the altar.

The reality, of course, is that it takes two to tie the knot.

Virtually all women respond to this to the effect of, “Well, he wasn’t like this when we were dating! He only started this after we were married!”

I call bullshit. There’s no such thing as an overnight transformation. If you’d been paying attention when you were dating, you could have predicted with reasonable accuracy what kind of man your husband would become. If you couldn’t, it’s either because you were too madly in lurvvvve to evaluate him properly, or more likely, you’re not half as socially aware as you think you are.

Also consider that he’s probably thinking the exact same thing about you. “Man, after we got married, she put on twenty pounds, stopped giving me blowjobs, and started nagging me all the time.” 

Any woman who’s slacking off on her wifely duties has no right to expect her husband to fulfill his.

This is the reality of sexual liberation, girls. If your husband is a loser, you’re probably a loser yourself, and it’s your own fault at the end of the day.

Read Next: Women Are Not the Enemy

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  • Tim

    Superb!

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  • sadly i agree

    Googled married women complaining…Sadly, I agree. As a 29yo female I have sat through hours of ‘girl talk’ which is basically boy talk. If I talk about anything like money, parents, careers, travel, etc. I am met with eye rolls and called a ‘complainer’. That’s my reputation…because I want to talk about a movie or food or anything other than boys. When they complain about their partners it isn’t called complaining it’s called socially acceptable girl talk because they think their sad lives are a never ending loop f sex and the city. You chose to be married, you chose to move in with your boyfriend…I cannot chose my parents or my landlord. I have real problems. Break up with him if it’s so bad! You don’t have a career path you have a marriage path that leads to dual income in the least. At best he takes over all bills and finances so you never speak to your landlord or electric company. Mommy and daddy did all that for you and now hubby does it. They love talking about feminism but they don’t live life as a 29yo struggling to make their career happen and paying their own bills. Marriage is not a real problem to me. Living in the south is hell because your peer group is so vapid. I feel sorry for men I really do sometimes. I cannot imagine what it is like to know at a young age you will have to pay and care for a grown adult and offspring all on your own.

  • Don Dressel

    Hey if a married woman is going to complain to me I would say bend over and I will make you forget all about your troubles! Yes that sounds terrible but then again so is women bitching about their husbands! Negativity is the worst thing! Women go home make love to your husbands tell him how great he is and believe me you will see a big change if not dump his ass!
    Another thing is I see these overweight fat ass husbands with one foot in the grave with their wives at the store and no wonder their wives complain! As for me I hit the gym and also work out at home so guys take it up a notch and get your ass off the couch!!!

  • Matt Warner

    I can’t wait to do this I feel like a kid who can’t sleep because it’s christmas eve!