Matt Forney
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How to Crush a Girl’s Self-Esteem

I’ve established in the past that high self-esteem in a girl is as attractive to men as a hidden penis. All else being equal, any man with a sack will choose an insecure girl who lives to please him over a Strong, Independent Woman™ every time. But because of you-go-grrl propaganda encouraging girls to behave like ersatz men, few if any women can admit their desire to submit to the whims of a man.

How do you smash through the veneer of confidence that girls possess?

Merely banging a girl isn’t enough for a man: he needs to possess her very being to be satisfied. All girls have an innate desire to sign themselves over to a man’s dominion, and if you know how to play her emotions, you can be that man. If you’re in a relationship with a girl, this is how you can crush her self-image and own her mind, body and soul.

1. Constantly make her feel inadequate.

You should rarely give her unqualified praise. Every time she does something for you, find out what she did wrong and remind her of it. If you can’t find any problems, make some up. For example, if she makes English muffins for you, point out that she burned them just a tad too much or didn’t let the butter melt quite long enough. If you’re worried about her getting fat, make an innocuous comment about how she’s getting “hefty” or “big.”

Nothing she does can ever be good enough for you.

When you’re chastising her, it’s paramount that you not sound angry or whiny. If you insult or complain to her, you’ll provoke a defensive reaction and she will resist you. Instead, you should always sound calm and collected, like you’re talking about the weather. Denigrating her in a neutral-but-firm fashion will trip her submissiveness circuitry, making her think about how she can better serve you. And every time she reaches the goalposts, you move them, forcing her to play an eternal game of catch-up.

This technique works even better if you can identify your girl’s Achilles’ heel and hammer away at it. For example, one of my exes was a former fat girl who had slimmed down just prior to me meeting her, giving her a massive complex about gaining weight. One day, we were walking to a diner for lunch when this happened:

GF: I think I’m gonna have the Big-Ass Burger.

Matt: You sure about that? Think you’re getting a little thick around the middle.

(Matt pokes GF in the tummy.)

GF (angry): DON’T DO THAT!

Matt: Oh c’mon, at least you’ll be warm in the winter.

End result: she ordered a salad and a glass of water. Fat shaming works!

Additionally, you should criticize your girl for everything, no matter how minor. Julian O’Dea pioneered the idea of applying the “broken windows” theory of crime to managing your girl. The concept is that if you criticize girls for minor mistakes, they’ll be less likely to commit major ones, as their mental energy is expended on dealing with your every complaint. For example, if you constantly critique the way she dresses, you won’t be arguing with her over whether she should get a tattoo or nose piercing to express her “individuality.”

Take this idea and run with it. Every time you find fault with your girl—even if it’s something you really don’t care about—hammer her on it. If she doesn’t reply to your texts quickly enough, chastise her. If she doesn’t make dinner the exact way you like it, chastise her. Hold her to a high standard and keep pushing it higher, ensuring she can never meet it… though it won’t stop her from trying.

2. Dominate her physically and sexually.

Repeatedly violate her boundaries in small, petty ways, small enough that she’ll feel petty for complaining to you. For example, if you’re into anal sex and she’s not thrilled about it, the next time you take her from behind, stick your finger into her asshole. If she doesn’t like facials, cum in her hair instead. Lightly clasp your hand around her throat during sex like you’re going to choke her. (Do not actually choke her. That is dangerous.) Smack her on the behind when you’re out in public. The possibilities are endless.

The message you want to send her is simple: it’s not her body anymore.

Most girls want you to dominate them anyway, but the rationalization hamster and their conscious minds prevent them from articulating this desire. This is the broken windows theory at play: if she lets you get away with minor violations of her boundaries, she’ll accede to your bigger demands later on, letting you mold her into the perfect plaything. If she doesn’t violently resist getting her anus fingered, a little more pressure and you’ll be full-on sodomizing her, grinning as she whimpers between each thrust. Never ask her for anything, because asking is begging, and begging is contemptible.

3. Isolate her from her friends and family.

You need to be the primary emotional influence in her life, and you can’t do that if she’s leaning on anyone else for support. Gradually wean her from contact with anyone other than you. The easiest way to do this is to get to know her friends and family, scan them for character flaws, and then plant seeds of doubt in her mind. For example, if her mother is divorced:

“Man, it’s sad that your parents aren’t still together. Do you think misery loves company?”

Or if she has a friend who is known for being unable to maintain a relationship:

“Chelsea’s gone through three boyfriends in the past year. You think she’ll ever find a man?”

Like with point one, you want to frame your comments in a firm-but-neutral manner. If she suspects you’re attacking her loved ones, she will instinctively side with them. You want her to sever ties with them of her own volition by making her think that her friends and family are untrustworthy and trying to sabotage her chances at happiness… with you.

On this same token, you should limit her use of Facebook and other social media if possible, as well as limit the amount of time she spends with anyone other than you (work/school excluded). Any avenue through which she can gain affirmation from someone other than you is one you want to choke off. Not only will this increase her emotional dependence on you, it will make her more willing to please you; she’ll be less likely to wreck the relationship if she knows she’ll be all alone if it goes south.

4. Reward her at random intervals.

If you’re all stick and no carrot, eventually even the most desperate female will shove off. As a result, you need to pat her on the head and tell her she’s been a good girl every so often.

But you can’t reward her for specific things; you have to be completely random with your praise.

Ever wonder why slot machines are so addictive? It’s because of pareidolia, the human tendency to try and divine patterns where none exist. Casinos take advantage of this by rigging their slot machines to pay out at random intervals, tricking people into trying to discern a winning strategy when there isn’t one.

This is how you should treat your girl. If you reward her every time she does good, she’ll see the pattern and use it to manipulate you. But if you reward her at random, her little hamster brain will run itself ragged trying to figure out your endgame. You want her to keep pulling the lever, praying for a payout and occasionally giving it to her, not letting her notice all the effort she’s burned in getting it.

5. Give her an emotional release.

Emotions are to girls as semen is to men, and if girls can’t release them, they get the psychological equivalent of blue balls. In the absence of masculine discipline, your girl will vent her emotions in unhealthy ways (starting arguments with you, taking antidepressants, whining on her Tumblr), so you need to bring the firm palm of authority down on her rear-end sooner rather than later.

One solution that seems to work for a lot of couples is Domestic Discipline, where the girl is spanked every time she acts up or in some cases just because. Christian Domestic Discipline fuses this idea with Biblical marriage. By spanking a girl until she starts crying and sobbing, you give her an emotional release, turning her into a soppy puddle of goo and making her more inclined to serve you. As a friend of mine put it, all girls crave spankings; it’s their way of making up for Eve’s sin.

6. Fuck her like it’s your last day on Earth.

This is the glue holding all the other points together. You absolutely must have good cocksmanship if you want to ruin a girl’s self-esteem. Girls are enslaved to their vaginas as much as men are to their penises, arguably more so because their overconfidence makes them more likely to make mistakes. Girls will do anything for a man who can fuck them good: flee the country to be with him, lie for him, and in extreme cases kill for him.

If you don’t believe this, it’s because you’ve never inspired that level of passion in a girl.

If you haven’t already, brush up on your bedroom technique. Your dick is heroin, she’s the junkie and you’re the dealer. Tiresias’ wisdom—that girls experience nine parts of sexual pleasure for every one part that men receive—is what makes this arrangement possible. If you can make her cum on a regular basis, she’ll side with you over her parents, her friends, everyone.

Additionally, don’t make her cum every time you have sex. Think like a dealer: you give the customer the pure stuff when you want to get them hooked, and when they’re addicted, you sell them shit that’s been cut with rat poison to increase your bottom line. Like with point four, rationing out her orgasms at random will keep her on her toes trying to satisfy you.

A girl without a man is like a flower without sunlight. Without a guiding masculine hand, she will shrivel and die. Encouraging girls to have high self-esteem to find fulfillment is like encouraging kids to get protein by eating fast food: a poor substitute for the real thing.

Deep inside, every girl is screaming for a man to put her in her place.

I hope my advice helps men across the world bring their wives and girlfriends to heel. And the best part of all this? When your girl submits, she’ll be doing it of her own free will… or at least she’ll think she is.

Good tidings to you.

Read Next: The Case Against Female Self-Esteem