Matt Forney
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How to Consistently Get Laid from Online Dating

This is a guest post by Kid Strangelove. Kid originally published this article at his own blog on November 19, 2010, but he deleted the site a while ago so he could focus on other projects. He asked me if I’d be willing to re-post some of his articles on my blog and I said yes.

“Dude, you’re not gonna believe this, but I pretty much just got it on with Stiffler’s mom.”

All stories have a good captivating beginning, and this one was no different. My roommate had just come back from another Internet date, and he was in incredibly high spirits.

“But I don’t know if we’re ever gonna get to do the weekend thing. I’m not really into cougars. Plus, I got two more dates set up for this week and like ten girls I haven’t even replied to yet. I gotta say, I never knew internet dating would be this easy.

And usually it isn’t. For years, Internet dating has been a mystery to even the most seasoned of players, and having tried several different methods myself, I wasn’t any closer to getting the one thing every guy strives for online: consistency. We all know the story: just about every moderate to good-looking female routinely gets her inbox filled to the brim with repetitive messages, and even if one person genuinely stands out, he might be really hard to see. I know: I created a fake girl profile on OkCupid years ago to see what dudes were writing, and my 300 message inbox got filled up in less than a week.

After a while, most people give up and make online dating into a background activity, with most stories of success coming from guys that say their friend is over six feet tall, has excellent pictures with at least one picture showing off his body, and list his large income in the profile. Face it dude, girls are at their shallowest online, and unless you’re tall, good looking and have money, then don’t bother.

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Girl, let’s go out Wednesday. On Tuesday, I’ll be too busy with business meetings, bench presses and listening.

However, my roommate is 5 foot 7, he’s in good shape but not bodybuilding-male-model-show-your-abs-in-every-picture status, and he lives in the same NYC shoe box that I do. So what is his secret? I’ve teased you long enough, here it is.

1. He signed up for How About We.

This NYC-based site (and sorry, it only covers New York right now) lets people browse not just profiles but actual dates that people suggest, hence the name. For example, you can search for “How about we… go to a wine bar and then go for a walk over the Brooklyn Bridge?” (an actual suggested date by a site user).

2. Suggest a date that’s far away (in distance or time), that you enjoy doing, and is more like a third or fourth date activity.

Do you like to hike? Go on wine tastings? Play paintball? Use that as your date suggestion, and make sure to say it’s a faraway date. His suggestion would be something like “How about we… go to Pennsylvania and I can teach you to play paintball?” Or “How about we… go deep into Long Island and we can learn to surf.” These are awesome activities that he loves to do, are far away and require some sort of skill. Another alternative is something that requires tickets and will happen at a future date, such as “How about we… go see Saturday Night Live December 11th. I got a pair of tickets.”

3. Wait.

Trust me, they will respond, and in large numbers.

4. Set up a small, cheap, “getting to know you” date.

Preferably, this date will be near your house. Use this time to find out more about the girl and go about your usual date routine. Remember, in the back of both of your minds you are dangling the super awesome suggested travel or future date, so this essentially evens out the chasing. You are no longer chasing the girl, she is chasing something that you’re offering.

5. Hook up.

You did plan the date near your house, right? Also, give your roommate a high five before you do.

6. Repeat steps four and five as needed.

I mean, you’re not just gonna take anyone on this day-long activity, right?

7. After a few cheap dates and hookups, if the girl has proven that she’s cool, take her on the originally suggested date.

If she’s a cool girl and has proven herself as a cool girl, go enjoy the activity that you love with her and let the romance blossom. Yes, I just said “let the romance blossom.”

Now, this system isn’t for everyone, and it does come with some warnings. For starters, this can only be done in NYC, since How About We doesn’t operate anywhere else. There are also way fewer girls on this site than more traditional ones like Match.com and OkCupid. Finally, How About We is a paid site, so you’ll have to pay a registration fee to join.

If none of that deters you, go out there and hook up! Just don’t forget to give me a high five when you do.

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Read Next: Online Dating Chronicles: The 18-Year Old — My Best Worst First Date