Matt Forney
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How to Infuriate Married Women Who Complain About Their Husbands

The next time you find yourself in a conversation with a woman and she’s whining about what an inattentive lout her husband is, drop this line:

“Yeah, that sucks, but remember, you’re the one who said ‘Yes.'”

Without fail, this line will drive every single one of them batshit crazy. It doesn’t matter how old they are, where they come from or their religious background, this line causes the hamster in every married woman’s brain to go nuclear. The secret is to say it matter-of-factly, like you’re telling her about the weather; it’ll make her freakout seem all the more ridiculous in comparison.

Why does this line cause wives so much distress?

Simple: modern women are allergic to the idea of taking any responsibility for their actions. Things just happen to them; they’re innocent victims of a misogynistic world. The way American women bitch about their husbands, you’d think they were all kidnap victims, who were going on their merry way one day when an unscrupulous drunk grabbed them, stuffed them in a burlap bag, and dragged them off to the altar.

The reality, of course, is that it takes two to tie the knot.

Virtually all women respond to this to the effect of, “Well, he wasn’t like this when we were dating! He only started this after we were married!”

I call bullshit. There’s no such thing as an overnight transformation. If you’d been paying attention when you were dating, you could have predicted with reasonable accuracy what kind of man your husband would become. If you couldn’t, it’s either because you were too madly in lurvvvve to evaluate him properly, or more likely, you’re not half as socially aware as you think you are.

Also consider that he’s probably thinking the exact same thing about you. “Man, after we got married, she put on twenty pounds, stopped giving me blowjobs, and started nagging me all the time.” 

Any woman who’s slacking off on her wifely duties has no right to expect her husband to fulfill his.

This is the reality of sexual liberation, girls. If your husband is a loser, you’re probably a loser yourself, and it’s your own fault at the end of the day.

Read Next: Women Are Not the Enemy