Matt Forney
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We Come Not to Praise the Men’s Rights Movement, But to Bury It

The papers have been signed, the assets have been divvied up, and the children have been traumatized for life. The MRAs and the paleomasculinists (no, I will not call us “gamers” or “PUAs”) have divorced once and for all. There are a few folks still trying to make amends, but this marriage was doomed from the start. I used to think the MRAs and game-types could get along because both are opposed to feminism, but that’s like saying Jews and Muslims should join forces because they both hate pork.

Life is a little more complicated than that.

The MRM has been around for twenty years in some form or another and it’s achieved approximately jack shit. It will achieve jack shit in the next ten years, waste away and be forgotten. Despite the triumphalism that twerps like Black Pill have about the impending end of the “Paleo-Game Cult,” the most popular MRM sites like A Voice for Men and Fathers & Families have fewer readers than popular “game” sites like Roosh V and Chateau Heartiste. Think about that. Despite all the resources and volunteers he has access to and the work he puts in, Paul Elam is being bitchslapped by Roosh, a guy who writes travel guides for a living and works alone.

Somebody’s dying here, but it ain’t the manosphere, that’s for sure.

The fundamental problem with the MRM is that it’s a hater movement, a negative movement. It attracts men who don’t want to do anything aside from snivel about how the world done fucked them over and criticize people without offering any ideas of their own. Paul Elam deserves some credit for trying to do actual activism, but the phrase “German commander, Italian troops” comes to mind. Hell, calling the MRM a “movement” is an insult to movements; the reality is that it’s more like a billion remoras furiously clinging to Elam’s taint, parasites claiming credit for “achievements” they had nothing to do with.

One of those parasites, named “Pro-Male/Anti-Feminist Tech,” recently pulled his lips off of Elam’s scrotum long enough to join the chorus of whining (hat tip: Jack Donovan):

What this is really all about is substantive action to advance mens rights which Paul Elam and others do vs. pretending to do something to advance mens rights like Roosh, John Rambo, and Peter Nolan do. This is why I reluctantly agree with Paul Elam saying goodbye to the manosphere. There’s way too much mental masturbation going on from conspiratorial accusations like the one above to whining about how the MRM is really “feminist”, to whining how the MRM doesn’t have a definition of masculinity. The MRM needs to focused on substantive action that rolls back feminist policies that hurt men and boys. That’s what Paul Elam and the rest of the crew of AVfM (in addition to many other MRAs) is all about. The reason why Paul Elam and the MRM is a focal point for attacks like the absurd attack against Paul Elam above is because anyone who just wants to pretend to so something & engage in mental masturbation is (by definition) opposed to substantive action and those that engage in substantive action.

Very rarely do you encounter someone on the Internet with this little self-awareness. If PM/AFT wants to see “mental masturbation,” he needs only to look at his precious men’s rights movement. Roosh’s post sent the MRAs into a frothing rage because it was the truth; most of them are failures who do nothing to advance the cause at all. withered and died when the “Bigot” category was added; it hasn’t been updated in months. Elam’s planned march on Washington was canceled because he couldn’t recruit enough men to fill a Wisconsin dive bar. “URLs @ Urinals” failed because MRAs can’t even be bothered to spend $10 and an hour per week to run off flyers at FedEx and post them in convention center bathrooms.

But who cares about doing actual work? We’re still activists!

And like most MRAs, PM/AFT is too chickenshit to write under his real name. To anyone who’ll respond to the effect of, “He doesn’t want to lose his job!” my response is simple: fuck you. If you’re not willing to suffer and bleed for something you believe in, you deserve to get steamrollered. If you write behind a fake name, you have no right to call yourself an activist, period. The fact that PM/AFT and his fellow travelers hide behind pseudonyms shows what they value most in life, and it’s not the cause of men’s rights.

They are not the men whom revolutions are made of, they are the bitches who get flattened by revolutions.

PM/AFT accusation that Jack is “whining” is particularly rich, and smacks of feminists who project their feelings of impotence and inferiority onto their enemies. If you think Jack’s post can be called “whining” in any way, shape or form, you’re either a liar or you don’t know the meaning of the word.

Over the weekend, I had the pleasure of hanging out with another reader of mine, Solo. (By the way, bookmark his blog, add it to your blogrolls and visit it every day.) While pre-gaming with tequila shots, he echoed the exact same sentiment I’ve heard in some form or another from the fellow bloggers I’ve met on this journey, whether it was Bronan and FFY in Des Moines or Tim back in Madison: he’s tired of people wallowing in negativity and hatred. With his blog, Solo tries to fire people up and inspire them to better themselves, whether that involves losing weight or becoming more social.

Feminists and outsiders accuse the manosphere of promoting “hatred,” but in my travels, the guys I’ve met are not haters at all. They’re normal, decent men committed to bettering themselves. I’ve already mentioned how Mark in Madison was inspired by reading The Freedom Twenty-Five Lifestyle Guide and other manosphere blogs to start building the life he wants to live. Even though I’ve only been around a short time, I’ve gotten numerous emails and comments from guys telling me what an inspiration I’ve been to them. Hell, the death of In Mala Fide, which Black Pill tried to spin as evidence of the “Paleo-Game Cult’s” collapse, directly inspired the creation of half-a-dozen new blogs, including The Neckbeard Chronicles, the Society of Amateur Gentlemen, and The Second Estate, the latter two of which directly carry on Ferdinand’s tradition of linking and plugging interesting blog posts.

MRAs can’t even inspire men to do actual activism. How many lives have Paul Elam, PM/AFT, Black Pill or their ilk changed for the better? I’m guessing a big, fat goose egg.

MRAs are haters, and while haters can attract a lot of attention from time to time, they’re ultimately doomed to fade into irrelevance. Mind you, I’m not some peace-and-love hippie. Hating is fun and necessary from time to time. Ripping into people who are stupid and destructive gives me a gooey, tingly feeling inside. And if you’ve been fucked over in a divorce or whatnot, you absolutely should be angry.

But the difference between the MRAs and me is that I’m actively working to better myself. I rip on fat chicks, but I’m dieting and exercising to get thin. I mock women for being boring, but I’m hitchhiking across America to jump-start a career as a writer and start an indie rock band, the exact opposite of being boring. Every sin I denounce is one I’m working to burn out of myself.

MRAs bitch about the undesirability of American women and the unfairness of divorce court, but what do they do about it? Zip. They write whiny blog posts/comments and spend their weekends playing Call of Duty and guzzling Miller Lite until they can’t see their shriveled nutsacks without a mirror.

Why should anyone take them seriously or care what they have to say?

Jack Donovan talks about “starting the world.” If you want to start the world, you have to start yourself. The manosphere is comprised of men “starting themselves”: hitting the gym to get ripped, hitting the books to make money, and hitting the bars to get laid. The MRM is comprised half by men who’ve been burned by feminism picking at their wounds for all eternity and half by perma-virgins like PM/AFT and Black Pill who resent women despite having never so much as kissed one.

Whose side are you on? Are you a hater or a winner?

I know where I stand. You can stay behind with the MRAs and cry about the unfairness of the world, or you can join the manosphere, bend the world over and fuck it cross-eyed. The choice is yours.

Read Next: The Problem with the Men’s Rights Movement