Matt Forney
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Why is the Perfect 10 So Hard to Find and Keep?

This is a guest post by Kid Strangelove. Kid originally published this article at his own blog on November 3, 2010, but he deleted the site a while ago so he could focus on other projects. He asked me if I’d be willing to re-post some of his articles on my blog and I said yes.

During my last search session on, I was browsing through profiles of girls that were currently logged on, laughing at the fact that only big girls—or girls that have yet to figure out how to turn off their on-site instant messaging—had the “IM Me now” feature enabled.



But then I noticed a girl that I’d previously messaged but never got a reply from. Her profile was amazing: she was young, had several bikini pictures handy to prove she’s not a secret fatty, said she liked cooking, claimed she was old school in her dating ways, spoke three languages, and topped it off with a poem. She was about as un-generic as you can get, and my type of girl, going by her profile. So I messaged her, not expecting anything in return (I’m pretty sure that I’ve never gotten an IM reply on that web site) but not wanting her to pass me by either.

Before I knew it, we were talking. Before I knew it, we were on the phone. And before I knew it, she was sitting next to me the next evening as we were drinking.

That’s when you know you’re out on a date with a beautiful girl: your eyes are fixed, not wandering. The only thing your eyes see is how other guys there are trying way harder with girls that are so… inferior. As we talked, she was sounding more impressive with every single thing she said. From her beliefs about life, family, and the like, she was getting more attractive to me with every passing second. I rarely say this, but I was smitten.

But then, a few drinks in, it all became clear. I wasn’t myself. I wasn’t my normal uber-confident, quick-witted, attractive self. My abundance mentality, my belief that almost every girl is replaceable—which gave me exactly what I needed to talk to girls with assertiveness—was gone. I knew this girl was rare, and I was completely off my game. And it showed. It showed bad. It will be a damn miracle if me and this girl hang out again.

So what have we learned? A perfect 10 is the ideal combination of looks and personality (and yes, in this case, personality was extremely important, just as important as looks). I contrasted this girl with two earlier relationships I had this year. The first girl was an all-around awesome cute, nerdy chick, but she wasn’t that great looking, so that spark, as corny as it sounds, was never there. Whenever I was out with her, as interesting as she was, I always looked elsewhere. The other girl was a beautiful, blonde, perfect-bodied dance team coach that couldn’t hold a conversation if her life depended on it, and our dates bored me to tears.

But what do you do in this case? Nowadays, every single time I go out (heck, even during my midday activities), I see fewer and fewer beautiful women every day. Bars are quickly turning into epic sausage fests. On most days I only spot a beautiful woman in passing, across the street and out of reach.

So what to do?

What I’ve always done: turn things around! Starting tonight, I will not frequent shitty bars with no women. I will not hit on girls that are less than beautiful, unless there are no other options and I am pretty drunk. I will add variety to my venues and activities. I will deal with the bullshit of the New York club scene, knowing full well the rewards that await me. I will meet pretty girls after pretty girls, so that these rare gems won’t be so rare and I’ll be back to my awesome self.

I will do this because I know the alternative. And I don’t like the alternative. I will do this because even though NYC has more women than men, your average night out can best be described by this brilliant Sex and the City spoof: “Sixes and the City.”

And I will do this because with the obesity rate skyrocketing to the point where fat is the new normal, this is my future, and I don’t know about you, but I find it terrifying.

Read Next: The Perfect Conversation: Win Any Girl with Words by Nicholas Jack