Matt Forney
Spread the Word!
rut

Why Am I Stuck in a Rut?

This is a guest post by Kid Strangelove. Kid originally published this article at his own blog on December 16, 2011, but he deleted the site a while ago so he could focus on other projects. He asked me if I’d be willing to re-post some of his articles on my blog and I said yes.

Come one, come all, and behold, for I am the ultimate in First World problems.

I am 27 years old and I’ve been working in the same place since I graduated college in December 2005. I was a late bloomer and my career was never my priority—video games and pussy were—but six years later I am in the same job, and I don’t want to leave because this 9 to 5:30 gig has me doing about 30 minutes of actual work a week. When it comes to pure hourly wages, I am the richest person I know. Yet the waking up, the office bullshit and politics, the corporate mismanagement, and tons of little everyday annoyances are picking at my skin.

I live in NYC, the greatest city in the world, and I never feel like I have enough money.

Yet I am blessed, and I say this in the truest meaning of the word.

I have an amazing family that cares about me no matter what.

My on-again-off-again and currently-off-again-with-a-high-chance-of-soon-being-on-again girlfriend loves me to an almost fanatical level.

I have friends that can help me with anything. And I don’t just mean the “we’ll be there to hug you” friends, I have friends that are actually goddamn ballers that offer baller advice.

One friend works at Blackrock, the largest asset management company in the world, doing “awesome computer shit” (saying more would compromise our identities).

One friend works for a high frequency trading firm and lives in a $3,000 a month apartment.

One friend just got hired by Google after some of the biggest companies in the world engaged in a bidding war to get him.

All of these guys will be making at least $200,000+ next year. All of these guys are my age.

I am the black sheep of the family. The black sheep that happens to fuck the most girls with the smallest amount of money spent.

I know I am at a crossroads in my life and I have no idea where I want to go. My friends are guiding me towards the corporate route, a route I know I can excel at. Shit, in about 25 minutes I am about to get a call from a recruiter from a large company that found me on LinkedIn… after i only put in my education and current job title. I’m supposed to be happy.

But something’s missing.

I tried to fill it up with the most random shit imaginable.

I’ve been doing standup comedy every so often.

I tried archery because it sounded fucking cool.

I ran a mildly successful celebrity gossip site a few years ago, and just got absolutely bored of it.

This girlfriend of mine loves me, and is by all accounts exactly what I’m looking for. But when I see some club girls, all done up, curves or skinniness on display, I subconsciously wish i could warp her personality into their bodies.

I need some fucking inspiration. And I am looking everywhere, but nothing is hitting.

I’m seeing a shrink, his advice is pretty solid, and he has actually been helping (and thank you insurance for covering a chunk of it).

I guess this weekend will be a bender.

I do have a couple of leads.

1. Developing mobile applications.

I have this little concept on how to make money with mobile apps. I’ve fucked around with them in the past, and this is purely a conceptual thing, but I think it can make me a few hundred bucks in monthly side money. And shit, if I go the corporate route, this thing will look impressive on my resume.

My boss told me its okay if I jack the Apple computer from work and take it home so I don’t have to come in to work on my apps. I like my boss, he’s a cool guy, and I see a lot of myself in him. Which is why he also scares the fuck out of me. He knows the corporate world is bullshit, but it seems like he accepted it as an unavoidable reality. He looks miserable all the time.

2. Writing a dieting/fitness book.

I had a good idea for a book in this genre. I lost a fuckload of weight on a pretty specific concept, and now I want to see if that concept can be applied a little broader. Ooooh, another mid-to-late twenties guy who thinks he has life figured out in e-book form? You betcha.

3. I can go on a knowledge bender.

Topics that interest me: economics, politics, free speech journalism, and more.

Wow. Just writing all of that shit calmed me the fuck down. I like this train-of-thought writing style. I think I’m gonna do that more.

Oh yeah: I’m gonna start posting a lot more.

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